Sunday, October 31, 2010

Halloween is gone

What is really sad about this day, is that in times past it was the one day that we could go out at night and be who we wanted to be, if we could screw up enough courage to present yourself as female if you lived as a male. As a child I had only one halloween where my costume was a dress. It became even more wishful thinking after I was married; heaven forbid if you were a closet dresser and your halloween costume was more flattering than what your wife ever wore. I think it would have been easier and more fun if one was single and presented as female than for someone who was trying desperately to keep one’s cross-dressing a secret. Don’t want to let your wife see you too excited about getting dressed.


For those who are thrilled for the opportunity to go out both straight, gay and/or trans it should be a safe time. But with all the bulling an hate being thrown our way we must constantly be aware of our surroundings. I only hope that we will not hear of gangs or groups of gay-hating youths who have beaten, hurt or kill those who they perceive to be gay as they roam their streets last night. We can only hope and pray.


For me, I don’t have to pretend anymore, I can be who I am; and you will never see me donning anything that would give the impression that I was cross-dressing as a man!


We are normally gone during Halloween, but last night we just went out to eat as our street seem pretty quite and deserted on Halloween. We did pass neighborhoods where the cars were lined up on the grass and mobs of children invaders were going house to house to collect their confectionary rewards for dressing up. It seems that’s the way halloween is done these days, families collect in small caravans and drive their trick-r-treat from neighborhood to neighborhood collecting their sugary rewards. I don’t remember my father taking me out to trick-r-treat, but I do remember walking with my children around our neighborhood and them collecting all the candy so they couldn’t get sick that night.


I remember making a ‘bat’ costume for my oldest child and as the years went by, they each wore the same costume; have the pictures to prove we did. I made it a priority to watch my children in any school or scouting activity they were involved with. I wanted them to know how much I cared about them, and loved them.


If I could make one wish, I wish that everyday could be halloween where we could dress up anyway we wanted and the other goblins and ghouls would not see us.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Miss Morano


Way to go, great message.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

High school chants

High school chants
Do students really understand how viral these 'cheers' can spread the hurt both to the other team and to the gay students that go to this school?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Be the Change

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Tuesday, October 12, 2010

You've got to be carefully taught-





You've got to be taught

To hate and fear

You've got to be taught

From year to Year

It's got to be drummed

in your dear little ear

You've got to be carefully taught


You've got to be taught

To be Afraid

Of people whose eyes

are oddly made

And people whose skin

Is a different shade

You've got to be carefully taught


You've got to be taught

Before it's too late

Before you are 6 or 7 or 8

To hate all the people

your relatives hate

You've got to be carefully taught


[Thanks to Laura for lyrics]

As I was in rehearsal for the local production of “South Pacific”, I was jolted again of the sense of urgency Roger’s and Hammerstein need to include this song in the musical. There was a storm again it’s being included and that was during the filming of the movie, in the Fifties.

It is heartbreaking to acknowledge that nothing has changed in the 60 years of so of it’s Broadway Premier in the way of children learning to hate by example. The reasons that these lyrics were included are just as relevant today as it was in those times. We have turned our hate towards other peoples, to other genders, to others size, or afflictions or disabilities that we ‘fear’, because they ‘are not like us’. We become bullies because it’s a way to fit in with those we perceive to have power over us. Our need to be included in a group sometimes blinds us to the dynamics of that particular group. The collective rage and hate churning out on those that the group doesn’t want to be associated with.

As individuals, groups or nations, we control others we fear by creating fear. Wouldn’t it be just as productive if we learned to listen and engage our children in conversations, where we would know if he or she is ‘bulling’ others we could stop them or when we would know if our children is being bullied for being different we could help them and let them be who they are.


The lyrics’ of that song in “South Pacific” which was written during a great time of national struggle is still such an important message for us, even today;


You've got to be taught

Before it's too late

Before you are 6 or 7 or 8

To hate all the people

your relatives hate

You've got to be carefully taught


Just one more thought, please

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Coming Out

I follow several blogs and the majority of the girls are that well into the transition journey. The path we walk to transgenderness is both unique and similar, Laura was asked to link to a post of 50 coming out stories at:50 Brave Posts about Coming Out

I know that each of us must find our own way, and I hope that these stories will let everyone realize that we are not alone on this journey but walking the path before us.