Those of us as transpeople who live open lives, risk being ignored, shunned, avoided or becoming victims of hate. People’s reactions as these, happen because others do not give us a chance, they don’t take the opportunity to get to know us; to sit down and ask the hard questions that separate fact from fiction. It’s very painful when you learn how your some of your family really feels about you in a very visible open social setting, as what happened to me during the reception at my nephews wedding, (See previous post).
But all those negative, repulsed feelings are just as quickly dissipated when surrounded by the people you have come to know and love. It’s the children who can get to the heart of the matter quickly; children who are not soured by hate and bigotry show their love for others in so many ways. Any pain inflicted upon me by those who won’t see or make an effort to get to know you as the changed person was quickly healed by spending a day with our good friends. As the children played and were taken to a playground, the three of us women continued working on a Christmas Quilt we had said we would do for someone who goes to church with us. Having made a pot of beef soup, we all gathered to eat and enjoy the day. The children decorated a gingerbread house that their mother had brought and we all ended the evening chasing the children around the house.
The week of joy and acceptance was topped off by the celebration of a wonderful Christmas Day dinner with this family who has chosen us. We worked our culinary arts for our guest during the morning before they arrived and since it was our friends who dined with us, the day was filled with laughter, eating and quiet time just talking and sewing on a quilt.
Watching the joy on the faces of two bright, pleasant children as they opened their Christmas gifts from us was happiness enough for me. Obviously we ‘chose well’ for the young man almost tore the box apart trying to get to the building set we gave him. You could see the delight and wheels turning as he began to think of the possibilities of different things he would build. Letting people and children get to know me because they want to is a great joy. Tears came to my eyes as I was given huge hugs from both of the children as they told me they loved me at the end of a great evening. We stood in the door way under the porch light as we always do, feeling happy, loved and joyful watching our dear friends drive away into the night.