I was reading a friends post about the dinner party she gave for some friends and even though she attended her own party in male costume, she had fun with preparations, cleaning, cooking, setting a nice table. Her wife was out of town for a few day but that didn't make her think twice about giving the party.

I think it safe to guess that as all of us transition, we must live in the neither world of genders as we must constantly shift between our two lives. Yesterday Kay and I sat down for another hour of taping for the documentary someone is making about our lives and how the family is dealing with me. As we were talking about how the family dealt with my dressing before my wife filed for divorce, he mentioned that during our previous discussion I would refer to myself in the 'third person' when talking about the years before I 'officially' transitioned. The professor had heard about my cross dressing by 1996, seven years before the divorce and transition.

I had not realized that I was separating that female person from my otherwise chaotic life, she really wasn't Sarah, but that female entity helped me so much in how I dealt with all my emotional issues with gender. When we would have friend over I remember being the one who cleaned the rooms and set the table, making sure we had a nice arrangement of flowers for the centerpiece.

There are guidelines and level that must be achieved, but we are missing the manual that gives direction. We have to learn what works for each of us as we travel down the path of transition; we must make our own way to reach that place of comfort and acceptance.

Unsettled feelings

Yesterday, I went with Kay to a family viewing, at it was in the evening and about 2 hrs away we skipped supper and went on our way. Along about the halfway point, we both had to use the bathroom and we grabbed some snacks for the rest of the journey. As we are traveling in an area of Georgia that can be rather conservative in their thinking and knowing that I am always reserve and quiet, hoping that I am spot on with my appearance.

As we were leaving, a man wearing a leather jacket and large beaded necklace, short hair; sort of a biker type art first glance, opened the door for us and told us to "Have a good evening Ladies" and let us go out first. As I was walking to our car another man passed me and our eyes met and I got a very unsettled feeling. He was a white man simply dressed in a shirt and pants, but when he looked at me it seemed like he was really studying me, carefully looking at the both of us.

I have never felt as uncomfortable around any man as I felt when I looked into his eyes, I was truly frightened and glad we were leaving. I may have over reacted but I was glad the biker guy was still close, I believe he would have come to our aid if anything would have happened. It took me awhile to calm down and tell Kay how I felt about what happened. Just glad we were getting out of town while he was in the store.

Fond Memories

I had pulled out my high school yearbook from 1964 and was looking at it with Kay. She pointed out a comment that I had not really read close enough, for it said; "Best of luck in the future to a great girl." signed one Larry Ashloch.

In 1964 my father had returned from his assignment in Alaska and was ordered to move to Wichita Falls, Tx in the middle of the school year. And so we made arrangement to come back to get our year books. Since my sister was a grade behind me, I really think that Larry must have thought he was signing her yearbook. I not, maybe he saw the real me!!

Final Thoughts

Friday 31st December

We have decided that it is time to head toward home and so we sadly say goodby to the good people at the Residence Inn and Memphis heading east. But first making a stop for Kay at a yarn shop. Then we head for Hwy 72 and Chattanooga Tn. For lunch we stop at a wonderful fun place called “Rocking Chair Rest”, filled with wonderful antiques, as we enter we are greeted by a life-size doll dressed as Grand-Paw sitting in an old rocking chair. We ear a lite lunch and are back on the road. After a rather long day of driving we arrive at the Comfort Inn in Chattanooga and settle in. We did buy a bottle of Sparkling Wine to celebrate New Years Eve but the crowd on Beale Street was enough for us, so after eating supper we settle under the covers watching Dick Clark’s New Years Eve Celebration and toast to the end of 2010 and the beginning of 2011.

I am optimistic for the New Year, but with the new powers in office, I am afraid things will only get worse for the little people of America. Happy New Year.

Saturday 1st January 2011

We are driving in a strong driving rain storm heading for Atlanta this morning after partaking in a little breakfast. We heard on the news last night of the terrible flooding in Hinesville, Al where we drove thru the afternoon before.

On every long trip it is the little memories that make everything worthwhile. Like driving down Hwy 80 from Montgomery to Selma that was part of the history of the Civil Rights movement. Seeing country that is very different rom what you know, rolling hills, hardwood, forest floors littered with bulging rocks everywhere. Going long distances before seeing a service plaza.

Walking into the Memphis Music Store and dancing with the owner to some good blues music. Watching a father and mother teaching their young daughter to play baseball and about hitting; encouraging the young girl to keep her eye on the ball and hit it to me. Watching the joy on the little girl’s face light up as she does and I catch the ball and dance around giving her a ‘high five’; watching the smiles of her parents and getting a big nod of thank you.

Discovering that the house where Elvis was born was about the same size as the house that WC Handy lived with his wife and 3 children. Learning that WC Handy was blind, I didn’t know that.

It was good to get away for a few days and discover that the places you visited wove into a theme of Civil Rights history, that that was something that evolved and wasn’t what you had set out to do, but just happened. It was good to get home, play with our dogs and sleep in our own beds again. Until next time, The Two Auntees, or should that be Two Grandmothers.

Good night America.

Our Journey continues

Thursday 30 December

Woke up and dressed late today, so we spent some time at the I-40 Welcome Station on the river in Memphis. While walking along the path by the river lined with maple trees, one could actually smell the maples, from the blanket of leaves and from the trees. Leaving the Welcome Station, we spent the rest of the morning at the Lorraine Motel which is not the Civil Rights Museum. It is a very powerful sight containing the story of our nations civil rights struggle, telling the story of every important person or event that propelled the struggle forward.

As I was watching and listening to the Movie, “The Witness”, told by one of the eye witness who stood on the balcony with Dr. King, just before he was killed. I was struck by the irony that the issues of the day are still being used by the opposing forces keeping others who are not the same as they, under the boot heel of oppression and discrimination. The struggles and issues that African Americans fought to erase from society only shifted toward the LGBT movements and their fight for equal recognition. Now all the anger and frustration is directed toward gay and trans population.

We spent some time at the river front parks and read about Tom Lee, a black man who used his 8 ft skiff to save 32 people when a riverboat capsized. He searched all night to save as many people as he could. Memphis is also about the stories of BB King, W.C. Handy, Elvis Presley, and so many more important figures of the Blues and Rock-N-Roll history.

As we tried to find Handy’s house we ran into roadblocks every where, so we parked our car at the hotel and walked to Beale street, we had noticed band members at the Civil Rights Museum and eventually learned that there was going to be a parade that afternoon. We didn’t learn the parade was for the College Bowl the next day and when we got to Beale street, we saw the mass of people still hanging around at the end of the parade. We eventually realized that the game was between UGA Dogs and UCF Knights. After finding WC Handy’s house and viewing the artifacts, we would be Miss T’s last visitors because she was closing for the pep rally that everyone was gathering for. What a crowd.

After eating at the City Blues Cafe for some more BBQ Ribs, we walked around the city for another couple of hours and turned in for the night.

Friday 31st December

We have decided that it is time to head toward home and so we sadly say goodby to the good people at the Residence Inn and Memphis heading east. But first making a stop for Kay at a yarn shop. Then we head for Hwy 72 and Chattanooga Tn. For lunch we stop at a wonderful fun place called “Rocking Chair Rest”, filled with wonderful antiques, as we enter we are greeted by a life-size doll dressed as Grand-Paw sitting in an old rocking chair. We ear a lite lunch and are back on the road. After a rather long day of driving we arrive at the Comfort Inn in Chattanooga and settle in. We did buy a bottle of Sparkling Wine to celebrate New Years Eve but the crowd on Beale Street was enough for us, so after eating supper we settle under the covers watching Dick Clark’s New Years Eve Celebration and toast to the end of 2010 and the beginning of 2011.

I am optimistic for the New Year, but with the new powers in office, I am afraid things will only get worse for the little people of America. Happy New Year.

Kay and Sarah Journey

Dec 29, Wednesday

Wednesday morning and we have changed our trip plans. Due to the strong possibilities of bad weather with have thunderstorms settling over New Orleans for the new year, so we have decided to cancel those plans and just see where the road takes us.

We just had to visit Elvis’ birthplace, very small house indeed. One has to pay to enter the museum, video and to attend the church service. We tried to walk into the church, the same church Elvis attended while growing up and we were stopped by someone inside the door asking, “Do yew gotta tiket” and before we can say anything she closes the door.

Getting turned around, we took a long scenic tour of Tupelo and finally got on our way to Oxford. If you haven’t been thru Oxford you will find a quaint old town. We ate at the Ajex Diner which was crowded which told us the place was good home cooking. Oxford, Miss. is William Faulkner’s home town, and there is a book store called “Square Books” with signed photos all over the walls. We are now headed North for other adventures.

Evening 29th December, we ended up in Memphis Tn. after crossing the Arkansas River so that Kay can say she visited that state and can check that one off her list of visited states.

After checking into the Residence Inn, we took a spin on Beale Street Memphis, had supper at the Flying Saucer and listened to some blues at Club 152 for awhile. After walking up and down Beale Street we stopped in for the live show at BB Kings Blues Club to finish the evening with some memphis BBQ wings and Delta Blues.